Tag Archives: sex addiction

Personal choice and empowerment

Posted on September 26, 2017

A Diverse and Welcoming Support Community

Rob Freundlich, SMART Recovery Meeting Facilitator

When I recognized and accepted my sex-related addiction in March 2015 (2 1/2 years ago), I started looking for resources to help in my recovery. I knew that in addition to a good therapist, I would need at least one good group. For various reasons, the 12-step approach didn’t appeal to me, so I looked for alternatives, and ended up finding SMART Recovery.

From the website, I learned that SMART emphasizes personal choice and empowerment, and uses a rational thought-based approach toward recovery It’s backed by scientific research and updated as new research and discoveries are made. On the site I also found a lot of information about the organization, detailed information about the program (including “how-to” pages), and an amazing amount of reading material about addiction and recovery in general.

For a science-minded person like me, who’d always thought I was very logical and rational but was mystified and frustrated at how illogical, irrational, and powerless this addiction had made me, it seemed like a great fit. The only catch was that even though the site talked about addiction in general, the materials seemed to focus an awful lot on substance addiction (primarily drinking). Would I fit in?

More importantly, would I be welcome? At the time, I had a tremendous amount of shame – more than most people with addictions because mine was … you know … SEX!

I walked into that first meeting very tentatively,  Continue reading

From Sex Addiction to a Meaningful Life

Posted on March 15, 2016

What Motivates a Person to Change?

It’s hard for any of us to walk away from pleasure. Hell, it’s hard for most of us to take a pass on the dessert tray.

Portrait of a young male labelled as YOU.

Consider the plight of the person who’s considering making a commitment to sex addiction recovery. The pleasure they experience is not from sex, per se, it’s from the rush of neurotransmitters that get released into the brain from the anticipation and the ritual involved in sexual acting out. In a state I have labeled “the erotic haze”, their reward receptors get flooded with the neurochemical dopamine and they feel great. They’re not really addicted to sex; they’re addicted to their own neurotransmitters.

Continue reading